The process of "coming out", "stepping out of the closet", is never easy. I thought I had the process down pat, but it doesn't change the fact that it's nerve-wracking to the core. It still shakes every fiber of my being and makes me worry that the person I'm telling, will abandon or leave me.
I suppose I shouldn't worry that much, because...the people around me, the people I choose to tell; are those that I value, hold close, and deserve to know. Their characters couldn't be more loving, caring, compassionate. I know these people, and I got close to these people because of their wonderful personalities and personal values. But, still...
I came out to a close friend last night, one that I probably should've told earlier. She was so accepting, so loving and caring...but I was crying throughout the process wondering if she'd understand, if she'd still see me as the same person, if she'd just block and ghost me.
In hindsight I probably could've told my story a little better, it was a mess because of my nerves. I managed to get most of it out, like...going to bed, looking at the night sky and wishing upon a lucky star that I was born a girl, and the pain that came with every morning which I wasn't. My friend...never questioned me. She never tried to challenge me. All she showed was love and acceptance.
At the end of all of this, keep in mind, it was 2AM at the time...she told me..."don't look at the stars too much, they'll get shy". I cried even more, haha.
:') Thank you, Dinosaur Buddy.
~ Macy/Hearth
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